Saturday, December 24, 2016

Worst Christmas song: ‘You’re A Mean One, Mr. Grinch’

I’ve been listening to a lot of Christmas music lately and I’ve decided that the worst popular holiday song is “You’re A Mean One, Mr. Grinch” from the classic animated special “How the Grinch Stole Christmas.”
Yes, it comes from a beloved film that relates to Christmas. But this song is just a non-stop list of insults directed at the Grinch.
No wonder he hated the Whos, if all they did was insult him.
Judge for yourself. Here are the lyrics:

You’re a mean one, Mr. Grinch
You really are a heel!
You’re as cuddly as a cactus
You’re as charming as an eel, Mr. Grinch
You’re a bad banana with a greasy black peel!

You’re a monster, Mr. Grinch
Your heart’s an empty hole!
Your brain is full of spiders
You’ve got garlic in your soul, Mr. Grinch
I wouldn’t touch you with a thirty-nine-and-a-half foot pole!

You’re a vile one, Mr. Grinch
You have termites in your smile
You have all the tender sweetness of a seasick crocodile, Mr. Grinch.
Given the choice between the two of you I’d take the seasick crocodile!

You’re a foul one, Mr. Grinch
You’re a nasty wasty skunk!
Your heart is full of unwashed socks
Your soul is full of gunk, Mr. Grinch

The three words that best describe you are as follows, and I quote: "Stink! Stank! Stunk!"

You’re a rotter, Mr. Grinch
You’re the king of sinful sots!
Your heart’s a dead tomato splotched with moldy purple spots, Mr. Grinch
Your soul is an appalling dump heap overflowing with the most disgraceful assortment of deplorable rubbish imaginable, mangled up in tangled up knots!

You nauseate me, Mr. Grinch
With a nauseous super “naus!”
You’re a crooked dirty jockey, and you drive a crooked horse, Mr. Grinch.
You’re a three-decker sauerkraut and toadstool sandwich With arsenic sauce! 

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